I Should Have Come of Age in the '60s

when it was "cool" to drop out of life and "find yourself" somewhere exotic like India, China, or California.

I wish we could financially afford for me to take a work hiatus. I'm just tired. I have so many other interests I want to explore, delve into whole-heartedly, be consumed by, but I can't. I need to be the financially responsible woman and put those on the back burner. I know, it sounds whiney; and quite frankly, I am whining. I need to whine every so often. It gets it out of my system. I can play the "poor me" card every so often and then get back to the tasks that my current reality sets out for me.

Don't get me wrong, I still love to teach. I really do. When I get the over-exhuberant kids who really want to learn, I'm gung-ho! I even enjoy the challenge of reaching out and igniting that "love of learning" in a kid who looks like he'd rather be anywhere but in your classroom.

I also still love being a mom. Nothing in this world is better than seeing my boys stumble sleepily out of their rooms in the morning to proclaim "Good morning, Mommy! I love you!" and give me big, giant hugs and kisses. Nothing is better.

But. There are times when I wish I could just freeze time, do what I want and need to do to help me feel balanced and sane and not frazzled and insane. Just enough time to exercise, knit (I really want to get back to this), scrapbook, read to feel satisfied, and then unfreeze life again and dive right back into the chaos that is working fulltime and raising three great kids. Oh, ya, and being a mighty fine wife on top of all that! ;)

Peace out, man. Peace out.